I have thought that some of you might like to read some of my sermons. I had a friend who used to do this on LiveJournal, and I really appreciated it. So I am going to catch up on the backlog, and when I write a new one, I will share it with all of you.
This first sermon (my first sermon EVER) was preached in April last year. It was for Chapel worship, and in front of all my peers. I apologize for its length -- still had to learn how much to preach and for how long. It was written with a close friend in mind, and she tells me that she appreciated it. The thing I found interesting was how many other people said that they found something in it for them. The Holy Spirit is awesome indeed.
The text: John 21: 1-19
Let us pray: Come Holy Spirit, inspire our souls and minds. Amen.
Here we are: nearing full circle. The disciples are processing what has happened – most likely spending a lot of time in silence together as they all ruminate on how the events surrounding Jesus are affecting them. Just previous to today’s gospel message Jesus appeared before the disciples and gave them peace. More than that, Jesus told the disciples that he was sending them out with the Holy Spirit – to be messengers of the news of God’s promise. Jesus appeared again a week later to show Thomas that he was indeed risen – and to teach them all that there will be many that will come to know Jesus and never see him, and those people will be blessed. We will be blessed – what good news, what great news!
And yet, here we are, back in a boat. The disciples apparently still needed some time to figure out what had just happened. They’re back in a boat, left in thought, ruminating on what’s happened. Simon Peter may be thinking about what happened when Jesus was arrested – how he denied Jesus three times. Three times Peter asserted that he was no friend of Jesus. And not having a way to talk to Jesus about what he’d done - Peter makes himself busy – he goes fishing. Out there on the water, obviously not catching any fish at all, Peter might be thinking about how he came to know Jesus, and the life he had as a follower of Jesus. And the thoughts are all building up in his head, thrumming and buzzing around as he falls deeper and deeper into his own thoughts.
In the morning, out there on the water, still no evidence of those darn fish that they had set out to catch, the disciples are lost in thought. And a man on the shore calls out to them to inquire about the fish. I imagine that the shortness of their answer may be part irritation about the disturbance and the lack of fish, but part shock of being called out of their thoughts. And the kooky guy on the shore tells them to recast their nets – there will be fish, he says – so why not, what’s one more cast in light of a less than productive night? Don’t you know it, they get a catch – quite a catch. And dawning slowly spreads from disciple to disciple. John says to Peter: that’s Jesus! And eager student, disciple, believer that Peter is, launches himself overboard and makes a straight line for Jesus – leaving the others to deal with the catch of fish. Jesus calmly deals with the excitement and ruckus by inviting the disciples to a breakfast of fish and bread. He centres them and calls them to a meal.
They had gone back to their responsibilities and are thinking about everything that still needs to get done – what they need to be doing, but haven’t started yet. They have spent the night on the lake, looking for fish. And hadn’t caught any. Jesus invites them back, shares a meal with them – a meal that might get them thinking again about their lives in their journeys with Jesus: being called from fishermen to fishers of men, feeding the many with fish and bread, sharing a particularly significant meal with Jesus before his death. This breakfast meal on the beach is slowly refocusing their minds to the world.
Then, sitting on the beach, mulling the significance of the last couple of years over in his mind, Simon Peter is stopped short. Jesus asks: Do you love me? Pardon, what? Yes, Jesus, I love you. You know that. “Feed my lambs.” Then maybe Peter’s overactive and tired mind thrums loudly, multiple thoughts all at once: Jesus has said he was a shepherd before, wasn’t he a carpenter’s son? Well, I know now that he’s the Son of God. What’s he getting at? Who are the sheep? How am I supposed to feed them? Does this go back to the fish? What does this have to do with fish? I like fish. And on and on. Jesus stops him. “Peter, do you love me?” What? Well yeah. You know I love you. “Tend my sheep.” Weird statement, must be a parable… Ooo-kay… and Peter’s mind starts going again, thought after thought all coming at once, trying to puzzle out what it is that Jesus is getting at. Thrum, thrum, thrumming louder and louder, drowning out the reality of what’s happening before him. Jesus stops Peter yet again. “Peter, do you love me?” Irritation bubbling up over the thrumming of his active mind, indignation that Jesus hasn’t got it yet. I said I love you – isn’t that good enough? But Peter gets through that, “Lord, you know everything. You know I love you.” And Jesus responds: “Feed my sheep”. And dawning descends on Peter – in that somewhat cryptic, somewhat one-sided conversation everything comes together and he gets it. It’s about thoughts and action.
The funny thing about thoughts is that thoughts have a way of taking over our being and doing. For most people in the world every year has a ‘hiccup’ moment where life and all of its responsibilities pile up. Everyone may feel overwhelmed at some point as they consider their ‘to-do’ lists of things that have to get done by deadline after deadline. Eventually all of those deadlines seem to be at the same time and every task falls onto another then another. We can get to a point where we are thinking hard about all of the things that need to get done, and we find that we are thinking more and more about that seemingly never shrinking “to-do” list, our pulses start to go faster and faster as our anxiety climbs higher and higher. Our brains start thrumming from all of the blood flowing while we are thinking and processing what we are doing and what we need to do. Thrum, thrum, thrumming – getting stronger and stronger and stronger still, and our ears switch to hearing only that racing, beating, thrumming. Perhaps it’s happening now as I talk about it. Our entire body hears only that thrumming. We can’t hear God gently prompting us, we can’t hear God in the world - we reach a point of only hearing our thoughts, ourselves drowning out the world, turning inward to our perceived failures or about to be failures. That dialogue is going on and on in our heads and God appears before us and calls us: refocusing us to what’s really going on around us, shocking us back into the world. Jesus comes before us through the symbols of a meal – refocusing us on God.
Simon Peter had that tangible signal about his focus, or lack thereof. Jesus appeared three times, spoke, called him to attention. Jesus sat him down to a meal. We may not get that tangible signal as Jesus stands near the lakes of our heavy thoughts, but that doesn’t mean that God isn’t there calling us to attention. We are called out of our tangled web of in-turned thought and sent out with a life-giving Christ. We are called to come to the table, to share in a meal. This bread and this wine are symbols of the love of God. Jesus is amongst us, as with the disciples, feasting with us - breaking us from our inner conflicts, our doubts and worries, our ruminations on the past. And we are doing this all together. We are invited to celebrate that love together – together with Jesus and with each other. Then dawning slowly passes from person to person. We are a community eating and drinking together – we are all here to be with Jesus, to be with God and to feel the love of God. We are here to say: Yes, God, we love you. You know that we love you. Through that meal it slowly creeps into our thoughts that everyone here at this table loves God, loves us, and we love them. And that thought gets bigger and goes further to encompass the church and the world. God is calling us to be at this meal and to see that in caring for and loving the people around us we are amplifying our love of God and God’s love for all of us. God is growing love abundantly to encompass the whole world. Our thoughts are retuned to love in Jesus through the action of a meal.
Peter gets it. Peter is on the beach with Jesus, and he knows that what Jesus is asking is not a commandment in the sense that this will be Peter’s responsibility, something to add to his “to-do” list, or even something that will become his new “to-do” list: Feed lambs – check, Tend sheep – check, Feed sheep – check! Peter is being invited into the love of God, absolving, forgiving, refocusing love that will reflect the love of God amplified back at Peter through sharing that love with the world. Jesus is refocusing the disciples to a previously stated commandment. Love others as I have loved you, go and share that good news. Refocus the world through a meal, through care, through love. So too, as we love Jesus, we will be prompted to action, to care for all the Jesus we see in everyone else, that we have seen in everyone else. We are tending each other and the world because we love. We are not ignoring what’s going on in our heads, but refocusing on the life around us so that what’s going in our heads doesn’t dominate us and pull us into ourselves, slowly blocking out the world around us. We are refocusing our throbbing ears and inner thoughts to those present before us. We get to encounter Jesus in a meal, in one another as we gather as community, and are called out of the thrumming pulse of our own lives, existing in the absolving, forgiving, refocusing love that is in our life. We are sent back out into the world to share that good news, encountering the love of God through the thoughts and action of tending the sheep as we have been tended. Amen.
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